Chapter One

Late February

Dr. Lily Wescott stood at the podium, peering through the spotlight into the sea of faces in the hotel ballroom. Many grinned and waved as she prepared to accept the Medical Professional Woman of the Year Award.

She brushed tears away, stunned and totally overwhelmed. These days, she blamed the rise and fall of her emotions on her pregnancy, though memories of the husband she'd lost in Afghanistan were never far from her heart.

Suddenly an odd sensation gripped her back and a cramp rippled through her stomach. As best she could, she fought to keep her shoulders back and a smile on her face. She couldn't go into labor now! She was only at thirty- three weeks.

But she was an ob/gynBand she knew all too well that her twins would come when they were ready. Lily could only hope for the best...

"Thank you," she said into the microphone. "I never imagined I'd win this award." She'd really expected one of her friends at the table to win. After all, they were all baby experts at the Family Tree Health Center in Lubbock, Texas. She went on, "At the Family Tree Fertility Center, we strive to help women whoC"

A second cramp squeezed Lily's side and she caught the wooden podium for support. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw her friend and colleague, Dr. Mitch Cortega jump to his feet, concern on his face. He rushed to the stage and up the steps!

As she managed to suck in a gulp of air, hot liquid washed down her leg. Oh, GodBI am in labor!

She was not going to panic. She was not going to crumple to the floor. She was not going to be embarrassed.

At her side now, Mitch's arm curled around her waist...his injured arm. The one he never let anyone see, she thought, needing something other than the pain to concentrate on. It was always covered, tonight by a well- cut black tuxedo that made his shoulders seem even broader than usual. She'd noticed that tonight...and it wasn't the first time...

"Can you walk?" he asked, his breath warm at her ear.

A murmur swept through the audience.

She turned, the side of her cheek brushing his chin. "I'm not sure."

Mitch's angular jaw tightened, his almost-black gaze held hers with...something she couldn't define. But then it was replaced by the empathy and compassion she'd felt from him many times before. "The twins are our main priority. Hold on to me if you can't stand on your own."

She really thought she could. The cramp faded away. If it weren't for the wetness between her legs, she could deny what was happening.

With Mitch's arm still around her, she took a couple of steps. Maybe she could even give the rest of her acceptance speechC

The lance of pain that pierced her back stole her breath and weakened her knees. She breathed, "Mitch."

And he was there...lifting her into his arms...carrying her down the dais steps.

"I'm driving her to the hospital myself," Mitch said, as Lily's friends and colleagues rushed toward him. "It will be quicker than waiting for an ambulance."

"And more economical," Lily realized aloud, trying to think practically. But that was difficult with Mitch's cologne reminding her of the last time he'd held her so close, on the day she'd discovered she was having twins. His grip felt safe now as it had then...as if no harm could come to her while she was in his arms.

She must be delusional.

"I'll ride with you," Jared Madison offered as he jogged alongside Mitch and pushed open the ballroom door. "I'll be handy if the twins won't wait since Lily's doc is at a conference."

Jared had his own obstetrical practice at Family Tree but took turns covering with the doctors in her practice. Lily knew and liked Jared and felt comfortable with him. Still, she murmured, "They'd darn well better wait. It's too early. They'll be too small!" Her last words almost caught in her throat and her bravado deflated.

In the middle of the hotel lobby, Mitch stopped. Turning to face her, he looked her directly in the eye. He said, "If you panic, Lily, you won't help the babies. Take calming breaths. You can do this."

Her heart felt lighter, as if Mitch was really part of this pregnancy, too. Not just because her husband had assigned him to watch over her, but because he cared. "If I'd taken the childbirth classes this month instead of nextC" She'd been putting them off, maybe trying to deny the inevitableBthat yet again, her life would be altered in an earth-shattering way.

"The twins would still come early," he reminded her. "They apparently want to meet their mom now."

Yes, they did. And she wanted to meet them. She couldn't wait to hold them and tell them how much she loved them. How much their daddy would have loved them...

Mitch's expression was gentle, as if he could ready her thoughts, but his gaze didn't waver. His arms were so strong. For a moment, she felt a little trill of excitement in her chest. But that was because of the babies coming, wasn't it?

"Let's go," she whispered, shaken by the emotions she didn't understand.

#

Mitch paced the maternity floor waiting room and stopped when he saw Lily's friends watching him peculiarly.

Mitch didn't like the worried expression on their faces. Raina, Gina and Tessa were all baby experts. Along with them, he knew premature babies often had problemsBthirty-three weeks was iffy.

Trying to loosen up the tight feeling in his shoulder, arm and handBinjuries that reminded him all too often of his service in IraqBMitch flexed them, then sank down on to one of the vinyl chairs.

Moving forward on the sofa, Tessa said gently, "When Jared needs us, he'll let us know."

What was worrying Mitch was that they hadn't heard anything in the hour they'd been here. Closing his eyes, he remembered the day Lily had learned she was having twins. It had been the week before Thanksgiving. One of the techs in the office had performed the ultrasound. Mitch had just finished discussing fertility procedure options with a couple. As his clients had headed for the reception area, he'd noticed Lily exit the exam room, her complexion almost sheet-white, her blue eyes very bright.

"The ultrasound go okay?" he'd asked.

"Oh Mitch, I'm having twins!"

He hadn't been able to tell if she was totally elated or totally terrified.

Clasping her hand, he'd pulled her into the office he'd just vacated. "What's going through your head?"

She'd stood at the chair in front of his desk, holding on to it for support. "The obvious. I'll be a single mom. My friends all say they'll help, but these babies will be my responsibility."

"Twins will always have each other," he pointed out. "They won't grow up lonely. They'll be able to play together." He hoped Lily could see the "up" side of this monumental news. "Girls or boys?"

"They're girls."

"Our techs are pretty good at distinguishing the difference."

Lily had actually blushed a little. Until he'd met her, he didn't think women blushed any more. But she was blonde, with fair skin and all of her emotions seemed to show in her complexion. Major ones had played over her face over the past few monthsCgrief, fear, determination, and the sheer missing of her husband.

"Troy would be so proud," she'd said, tears beginning to run down her face.

That's when Mitch had done something he never should have done. He'd taken her into his arms. She'd laid her head on his shoulder, crying. And he'd felt desire that had no place in that room.

Mitch had met TroyBat that time he and Lily had been engagedBwhen the staff had planned a dinner to welcome Mitch into the practice. Since he'd once served in the Army National Guard and Troy still had, they'd developed an immediate rapport, becoming friends. After they'd married, Troy had even asked Mitch to watch over Lily while he'd served overseas.

But then Troy had been killed in action, leaving Lily pregnant and alone...

Afterward, when she'd looked up at him, he wasn't sure what he'd seen there. Yet he knew damn well it hadn't been interest. Gratitude, maybe?

She'd pulled away, wiped her eyes and mumbled an awkward apology and they'd gone their separate ways. They'd gone back to being colleagues. She hadn't really confided in him again.

That was okay. Being merely colleagues was safer for both of them.

Now, however, it was the last week in February and she was in labor. When he'd seen her double over on that dais, he'd felt panic twist his gut.

"Mitch!" A male voice called his name.

When he opened his eyes, he saw Jared, gesturing from the hall.

He stood immediately. "What's going on?"

"She wants you."

"What do you mean, she wants me?"

"She's in labor, and she wants you to coach her."

Her friends all glanced his way. He knew they were wondering why and so was he. But he wasn't going to ask Jared his questions. He was going to ask Lily.

"Suit up," Jared advised him. "When you're ready, she's in delivery room two."

Five minutes later, Mitch had pulled sterile garb over his clothes. It would feel strange being back in an operating room setting, though a delivery room wasn't exactly that. When he'd rushed through the ER with Lily, one of the nurses had waved at him. Years ago, she'd worked with him in trauma surgery.

Sometimes he itched to be doing that kind of work again. Reflexively, he bent his fingers, most of them not responding well. But he'd gotten used to limited use of his right hand as well as insomnia and nightmares and a stiffness in his shoulder and leg he could lessen with the right balance of exercise and daily activity. He was damn lucky he'd left Iraq with his life. There was no point in complaining about what might have been. Changing his specialty to endocrinology had been sanity-saving for him.

When he pushed open the door of the delivery room, he forgot about whether he should or shouldn't be there. Seeing Lily on the table, her face flushed, her hands clenched tight on the sheet, a protective urge took over. She was hooked up to monitors that measured the frequency and intensity of contractions as well as the babies' heart rates. She looked small and frightened...and fragile. Yet he knew she was the strongest woman he'd ever known. She'd proved that since her husband had died.

He strode to the bed, hooked a stool with his foot, and positioned it beside her. Glancing at Emily Madison, Jared's wife and a professional midwife, he asked, "Don't you want Emily to coach you?"

Lily pushed damp hair behind her ear. "She's assisting Jared."

He knew why he was fighting being here. Witnessing a woman in labor, watching a birth, was an intimate experience. Right now, bonding with Lily would be foolish.

He could see a contraction gearing up in intensity.

Maybe she just wanted him here instead of one of her friends because he might be more detached yet professional about the births.

With a mental kick that he hoped would push him toward that detachment, he took hold of her hand, felt the softness and warmth of it.

Suddenly she squeezed his fingers so hard, he lost any feeling he did have left. But the pressure reminded him he had a job to do. If he concentrated on coaching, maybe he wouldn't notice how her chin quivered or how her eyes grew shiny with emotion.

When the contraction eased, he admitted, "I'm not sure how best to help you."

"You worked with men in the field. You helped them. Help me the same way. Just help me focus on something."

She was right. He had helped men before and after surgeries, with mortar blasts exploding, with rocket- propelled grenades shattering the air. Finally he really did understand why she wanted him.

Realizing what he had to do, he smoothed his thumb over the top of her hand, telling himself his need to touch her was simply to be comforting. "Watch my nose," Mitch ordered Lily.

She looked at him as if he was crazy. "You're kidding, right?"

"I'm not. Use it as your focal point and listen to the sound of my voice."

Her eyes were on his instead of on his nose. He saw so many emotions thereCworry, hope and grief...the resoluteness he'd admired as she'd exhibited it each day, ready to go on with her life and caring for her twins.

Mitch saw her tense and turned to the monitor. With another contraction coming, he squeezed her hand. "You can do this."

She was still looking into his eyes instead of at his nose. He felt as if his heart was going to jump out of his chest. He felt as if...he shouldn't be here. Again, he warned himself that he couldn't make this intimate a connection. He should just be watching over her.

But how could he watch over her without getting involved?

At this moment, he wished he'd never made that promise to Troy.

At the foot of the bed, Emily said, "Lily, you can start pushing now."

At that moment, neonatologist Francesca Fitzgerald came into the room with two nurses behind her.

Lily gasped, "Francesca."

The doctor patted Lily's arm and summed up the situation with a quick assessment. "My team's here. You do your part and we'll take care of the rest."

Lily's contraction peaked and her cry of pain sliced through Mitch.

Jared encouraged her. "Good one, Lily. Come on. I want this baby out."

"You can do this," Mitch reminded her. He held her hand as the tension built in her body again. Her face reddened and she gave another fantastically effort-filled push.

All at once he heard Jared say, "I've got one!"

"Is she all right?" Lily asked, "Please tell me she's all right."

A light infant cry came from the area where Francesca was standing. It was very light, but it was a cry.

"She's a beauty," Jared told her. "We might have a few minutes now. I want to get her sister out as quickly as I can."

"I don't think I have a few minutes," Lily gasped. "It's starting again." She practically sat up with the strength and pain of the contraction.

"Use it," Mitch said. "Go with it."

"Just one more push," Emily encouraged her. "She's your youngest. You're going to have to coax her a little harder."

Mitch realized Lily wasn't focusing on him any more. She was breathing when she had to, breathing any way she could. She needed a different type of support, physical as well as emotional. Knowing exactly what he had to do, he stood, went to the head of the birthing table and wrapped his arm around her shoulders. He warned himself he was only a substitute for Troy. But he didn't feel like a substitute. His arms around Lily, he knew he was doing this for himself as well as his friend.

Tears swept down her cheeks. Her bangs were plastered to her forehead. She pushed her shoulder-length hair away from her face and stared straight ahead.

As her contraction built, her body curved into it, curved around it. Mitch held her as she delivered a second little girl.

Jared announced, "And here's Princess number two."

Again he passed the infant to Francesca who worked at clearing her airway, cleaning her eyes, checking her lungs, hooking her up to the ventilator to help her breathe. When Mitch saw that, a lump rose in his throat.

"I've got them," Francesca reassured Lily. "I'll be around to give you a report as soon as I can." Then she pushed the babies away, out another door before Lily even glimpsed them.

Reluctantly, Mitch released Lily as she collapsed onto the bed, murmuring, "Maybe I should have quit work sooner and stayed in bed. It's often recommended with twins. But I rested the past two weeks. I kept my feet up as much as I could."

Mitch knew he had to keep Lily calm after her ordeal. "You did everything you thought was best. That's all you could do."

lily surprised him when she caught his hand again and held it tight. "Troy should have been here. He should have seen his girls born. He should have helped me name them. He should have...he should have..."

"He should have never died," Mitch filled in.

Lily bowed her head and finally let the tears fall. Mitch did the only thing he couldBhe held her in his arms until she simple couldn't cry anymore.

#

Lily had been settled in her hospital room for at least two hours and was growing anxious. Why hadn't Francesca come yet? Wouldn't they have told her if something had happened to either of the babies?

Her gaze landed on Mitch who was standing at the window. He was as calm as she was agitated. Where did that calm come from after what he'd been through? He'd been presented a Combat Medical Badge, awarded a Silver Star and a Purple Heart, though he never spoke of them. Troy had told her Mitch had been involved in an IED explosion.

"How do you do it?" she asked, following the train of thoughts in her head.

Minus his jacket and tie, his white tuxedo shirt was rumpled. He turned to look at her. "Do what?"

"Stay calm under any circumstances."

He shot her a wry half smile. "It's a learned technique."

Interested in anything that would keep her mind off what was going on down the hall, she asked, "Like meditation?"

Even though she'd worked with Mitch for over two and a half years, she didn't know much about him. Just the little Troy had told her. She knew he was forty-five, had been born in SagebrushCthe small town where they both lived about fifteen minutes outside of LubbockCbut he had no family there. He'd been deployed to Iraq, injured and changed specialtiesBfrom trauma surgery to endocrinology because he'd lost the fine coordination in his hand that he needed to perform surgery. But that was about the extent of her background knowledge of him.

"I learned several techniques," he replied, running his hand through his jet-black hair. "Meditation was one. Guided imagery was another."

Her gaze went to his hand and the ragged scars there. She wanted to ask if he'd learned the techniques after he'd been hurt and whether or not they'd been his method of recovering. But that was such personal territory. If he didn't mention Iraq himself, she knew better than to jump into it.

In spite of herself, she still remembered gazing into his eyes rather than looking at his nose while he'd coached her. Every time since the day she'd told him she was having twins, she'd felt such an intense...

She wasn't sure what it was she felt. Mitch knew things. He'd felt things. She could just instinctively sense that. The compassion he showed her seemed personal but maybe he was that way with everyone.

"You know, your friends wanted to stay," he said.

Yes, she did. But they all had children and husbands and practices to see to. "I told them there was nothing they could do here. I'm going to call them as soon as we find out about the babies. Oh, Mitch, what's taking so long?"

Leaving his pensive position at the window, he crossed to her bed. He was so tall...confident...strong.

She remembered being held in his armsCin the exam room at the practice, on the dais, in the delivery room. His cologne had wrapped around her as he'd given her his strength. That's why she'd needed him with her through the deliveryBbecause he was so strong. Now when she looked at him, she could hardly swallow.

With one push of his booted foot, the comfortable chair by the night stand was now beside her bed. He sank down into it. It was well after one A.M. and she knew he had to be tired after a full day of work. She should tell him to go home, too. But he seemed willing to see her through this and she felt she needed him here.

Though she realized her body was ready for a good long rest, she couldn't relax. Adrenaline was still rushing through her because she was so concerned about her twins.

In the labor room, Mitch had taken her hand. Now he didn't.

Why should it matter? she wondered. She quickly decided it didn't. After all, she was still in love with Troy. At times, she thought she heard his voice in the next room. Other times, she expected his booming voice to announce that he was home. She fought back sudden emotion.

Mitch's deep even voice reassured her, "I have a feeling Francesca will only come to you after the babies are stabilized...after she can tell you something for certain."

"You're so honest," Lily blurted out. "I wanted you to say she probably had another emergency and that's why it was taking her so long."

"Do you believe that?"

His expression wasn't stern. His lean cheeks and high cheekbones just made him appear that way sometimes. As his black brows drew together just a little, he looked expectant...as if he knew she couldn't lie to herself.

"It's possible," she murmured.

"Yes, it's possible," he agreed.

"Talk to me about something," she pleaded. "Anything."

She knew she might be asking for a lot. Mitch communicated, but only when he had something to say. Chitchat didn't seem to be in his nature. But now she would be glad for anything her mind could latch on to.

"When is Raina McGraw's baby due?"

Lily smiled, picturing her friend and how her stomach was rounding.

"June fifth. Talk about having a lot on your plate," Lily said with a small smile, thinking about Raina's new family.

"I understand Shep adopted three children before she married him."

"They're still in the process with Manuel, their two- and-a-half-year-old. Shep had started adoption proceedings but then he and Raina married. It was almost like starting over. Shep has a housekeeper and Eva is wonderful, but Raina could be running from morning to night once the baby's born. I think she's going to take a leave from her practice."

"Have you decided yet how long you're going to stay out?"

"I'll make up my mind soon. Everything about my life is in flux right now."

"You don't have to decide right away. You might have to consider getting help with the twins."

"No, I won't need it." Lily's present roommate who was a nurse on a disaster relief mission right now was the reason. "Angie says she'll help me. Besides, there are lots of moms who take care of two babies."

"Not necessarily at the same time." His tone held a warning note that maybe she was being a little too Pollyanna-ish.

"I can handle it, Mitch. You'll see."

She was contemplating the idea of breast-feeding both babies when the door pushed open and Francesca walked in. She seemed surprised to see Mitch there, but didn't comment.

Lily hadn't known Francesca very long. But one evening, the women who'd lived in the Victorian house on a quiet street in Sagebrush had gathered there and just enjoyed a ladies night of chatting and sharing backgrounds. All of them were connected in so many waysCthrough their professions, their friendships, or their family ties.

Lily had felt so alone after Troy had died, but that night, all of the women had made her feel as if she had a support network.

"Tell me," she said to Francesca.

"Your oldest daughter weighs four point two pounds, is seventeen inches long, and needs a little time to put on weight. We're giving her CPAP treatment. She's breathing on her own and is definitely a crier when she's unhappy."

The continuous positive airway pressure would help the infant breathe but not breathe for her. Lily's heart swelled with love for this tiny baby on whom she hadn't even laid eyes yet. "And my youngest?" Her voice shook a little bit when she asked.

"She weighs four pounds, is sixteen and a half inches, and had trouble breathing." Francesca immediately held up both hands. "Now don't panic. We have her stabilized. She's on a ventilator for nowC"

"Oh my God!" Lily's chest felt so tight she could hardly breathe.

"I mean it, Lily. Don't panic. We'll wean her off of it. Her lungs need to develop and of course, she needs to gain weight, too, before she can go home."

"When can I see them?"

Francesca sighed. "I shouldn't allow it, but I know you're not going to rest or get any sleep until I let you visit them."

Lily nodded. She was happy, afraid and plain exhausted. But she had to see them.

"All right. I'll find a wheelchair. But you can only have a few minutes with them, and then I need to tuck you in. Childbirth is natural, but it's traumatic, too, and you need time to recover."

"I know," Lily said. "When do you think I'll be discharged?"

"You'll have to ask Jared that, but my guess is you'll be here until Sunday morning."

At least she'd be here so she could visit her babies. Her babies. Everything about their birth came rushing back, especially Mitch's presence and support. "Can Mitch come, too?"

Francesca hesitated and looked from one of them to the other. "This is just for a few minutes. You both have to wear masks and sterile gowns. I'll be right back."

Mitch looked troubled. "Are you sure you want me there, Lily?"

"You helped me bring them into the world. Of course I want you there."

Maybe it was because of the letter Troy had left for her. In it, he'd told her he'd asked Mitch to look after her if anything happened to him. He'd trusted Mitch and that made it easy for her to trust him, too. He'd certainly come through for her tonight.

#

Ten minutes later, Lily and Mitch were in the NIC unit., staring at her two precious infants. The two babies absolutely snatched Lily's breath away.

Mitch stood behind her, his hand on her shoulder. "Have you considered names?"

"Now that I see them, I can name them." She pointed to her first-born, saying lightly, "Sophie, I'd like you to meet Mitch. He helped me bring you into this world."

Her baby opened her eyes, seemed to gaze at them both for a few seconds before she closed them again.

Lily's heart overflowed with love that she hoped she could pour over them both like a protective blanket. Then her focus turned to her youngest who needed help to breathe.

Mitch's fingers tightened on Lily's shoulder and she was so grateful for his solid bulk, his stalwart caring.

"And this tiny angel isB" Lily's voice caught. Finally she managed to say, "Her name is Grace."

Mitch crouched down beside Lily so he could see her children from her vantage point. The slant of his jaw almost grazed her cheek as he reassured her, "They're going to gain weight and strength each day."

When Mitch turned to her instead of the twins, Lily's heart beat faster. "Thank you," she said simply.

"You're welcome," Mitch returned with a crooked smile. Just for tonight, she'd let Mitch Cortega be her rock. Just for tonight, she'd depend on him.

Then she'd stand on her own two feet and raise her babies alone.